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Tuesday, January 25, 2005

The Harmons (my Oscars)

The Academy is a little too stuff-shirt for my tastes most years, and watching them fall all over themselves to collectively suck Clint Eastwood's cock for a second year in a row has made me ill. So ... I present the Harmons. Fuck the Oscars.
(I haven't seen enough of the heavy hitters to give 5 nominations, so I've given only 4.)

Nominations

Best Picture
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Fahrenheit 9/11
Garden State
Napoleon Dynamite

Best Director
Brad Bird - The Incredibles
Michel Gondry - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Michael Moore - Fahrenheit 9/11
Quentin Tarantino - Kill Bill Vol. 2

Best Screenplay
Brad Bird - The Incredibles
Zach Braff - Garden State
Jared & Jerusha Hess - Napoleon Dynamite
Charlie Kaufman - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Best Animated Feature
The Incredibles (it wins. no worthy competition)

Best Foreign Feature
Oldboy
Shaun of the Dead (haven't had a chance to see the other 2 foreign films I wanted to this year.)

Best Actor
Jim Carrey - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Paul Giomatti - Sideways
Bill Murray - The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Clive Owen - Closer

Best Actress
Natalie Portman - Garden State
Natalie Portman - Closer
Uma Thurman - Kill Bill Vol. 2
Kate Winslet - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Best Supporting Actor
David Carradine - Kill Bill Vol. 2
Macaulay Culkin - Saved!
Peter Sarsgåard - Garden State
Mark Wahlberg - I Heart Huckabees

Best Supporting Actress
Kirsten Dunst - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Darryl Hannah - Kill Bill Vol. 2
Virginia Madsen - Sideways
Mandy Moore - Saved!

Who will win?! Vote in the comment box, let's see.

posted by Mike at 1:57 AM

6 Comments:

  • If a single one of you says Shrek 2 is better than the Incredibles I'll feed you your own genitals. Fair warning.

    By Blogger Mike, at January 25, 2005 2:55 AM  

  • My votes

    Best Picture-Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Director: Gondry, although if I were doing the list, I'd put up Zack Snyder for Dawn of the Dead or Michael Mann for Collateral.

    Best Screenplay-Eternal Sunshine, although, truth be told, I'm not really a huge fan of Kauffman's writing.

    You forgot to mention Ghost in the Shell 2 and Team America for best animated film.

    OldBoy for best foreign film, hands down.

    I haven't seen Sideways, so I guess I'll have to go for Carey for Eternal Sunshine.

    Portman twice for best actress? Supporting actress, yeah, but best actress? I'll go with Kate Winslet.

    Best Supporting actor goes to Caradine. And dude, if you gave Dunst a supporting nod in Eternal Sunshine, shouldn't one give a nod to Elijiah Wood for being so creepy in that movie? I thought that he stretched moreso than she did.

    None of the actresses that you've posted for best supporting does it for me. I'd go with Portman in either or her roles.

    By Blogger Rob, at January 25, 2005 1:10 PM  

  • Dude... first off, other than Kaufman being a genius, you're the first person I would have thought would love his stuff. Weird.

    But, Puppetry and Animation are night and day. Two different beasts. Calling puppetry animation was a mistake the New York Times made and pissed off the entire animation community. So... Team America isn't elligible. Although I'd love to have seen it get nominated for SOMETHING.

    Still fucking pissed off that the Oscars snubbed Jim Carrey, Paul Giomatti and David Carradine. The Golden Globes got it right. Fuck, when are those elitist shitheads going to learn that you don't have to cry a whole fucking annoying amount to be a good actor.

    By Blogger Mike, at January 25, 2005 10:27 PM  

  • As to supporting actresses not a lot of performances stood out for me to be honest. And Natalie Portman was as main a character in Closer than she was in Garden State, she was integral. I would've put her in actress instead of supporting. Closer was amazing for acting. Plus Stephen Soderberg got nominated twice in the same year so why not?

    And Elijah Wood was good. But I preferred the 4 I mentioned.

    By Blogger Mike, at January 25, 2005 10:31 PM  

  • I think that acording to Academy rules, Team America counts as animation. That's why I put it up there.

    You want recognition for that movie that doesn't include animation? I say nominate "America: Fuck Yeah" for best original song.

    By Blogger Rob, at January 25, 2005 11:57 PM  

  • If I chose... I'd go with:

    Best Picture
    Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Director
    Michel Gondry - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Screenplay
    Charlie Kaufman & co. - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Animated Feature
    The Incredibles

    Best Foreign Feature
    Shaun of the Dead

    Best Actor
    Jim Carrey - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Actress
    Kate Winslet - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

    Best Supporting Actor
    David Carradine - Kill Bill Vol. 2

    Best Supporting Actress
    Darryl Hannah - Kill Bill Vol. 2

    ...and America, Fuck Yeah! from Team America for best song.

    By Blogger Mike, at January 28, 2005 12:57 PM  

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